When theres a fly in your room and you’re trying to kill it then it hides for an hour then you finally find it
two vampire friends lying on the floor getting drunk and describing eachother because they can’t use mirrors don’t even try to tell me that isn’t adorable
for the first time in my life ive found something i may like about vampires
guYS IM FUCKING CRYING I RAN OUT OF PADS SO I WENT INTO MY MOMS ROOM AND I FOUND ONE BUT I WAS LIKE “OMG THIS IS HUGE MAYBE ITS JUST THE PACKAGING” AND THEN I OPENED IT AND ITS LIKE MORE THAN HALF THE LENGTH OF MY ARM AND ITS BIGGER THAN IT TOO OMG I CANT CLOSE MY LEGS. SEND HELP.
ON THE BRIGHT SIDE I WONT LEAK NOW RIGHT?
when you hear your mom coming home and remember all the chores you were supposed to do
IM REALLY TIRED OF PARENTS THINKING THAT EVERYONE ON THE INTERNET IS A PREDATOR
ikr wanna meet up and talk about it so where do you live?
1. When you cut yourself, clean and bandage it.
2. Do not start smoking cigarettes because the boy who broke your heart does.
3. When you want to kill yourself, don’t.
4. Cutting calories doesn’t do anything but make you unhappy.
5. If the number on the scale rises, throw it out.
6. The first girl you ever “date” is going to call the police on you even though she lives three thousand miles away, because you’re going to tell her that you’re not in a good mental state shortly after you’ve “broken up”.
7. When you want to kill yourself, don’t.
8. Break up with the boy who says, “You had a sexy phase!” when you tell him that you’ve dated a girl before.
9. Dating your friends is not always the best idea, but you can still be friends after you’ve broken up.
10. Your mother will try to become your best friend because you’re leaving for college soon, let her.
11. When you want to kill yourself, don’t.
12. Your closest friend will stop talking to you when you leave for college.
13. It’s always okay to cry.
14. When you want to kill yourself, don’t.
15. When you cut yourself again, clean and bandage it. Do not be ashamed.
16. Your anxiety is going to try and control your entire life. Tell it to shut the hell up, because you’re trying to live and that task is hard enough as it is.
17. The past has a funny way of coming back in the form of you developing a crush on another friend.
18. Try not to hate yourself for breaking up with your boyfriend.
19. If you’re still smoking, apologize silently to your mother.
20. When you want to kill yourself, don’t.❞
how can lawyers argue without crying
if i went into a courtroom i’d be all
now you fucking listen here you little cumslut
"he has been found guilty”
"HA IN YOUR FUCKING FACES, BITCHES."
one time i picked up a penny and i hit my head on the door handle and i have a tiny scar from it and that was the third worst time i ever picked up a penny
the second worst time i ever picked up a penny was when one time i picked up a penny on the street and i almost got hit by a car
what’s the worst time you ever picked up a penny
i was in an airport and i hit a baby by accident